This Valentines day I am recording a special episode for the women out there with IBS who want and need to know how they can love themselves even when their bodies are loud and frustrating.
Even when things are not going well, you can still nurture the most important relationship in your life, your relationship with yourself (and especially your body).
Listen in today to learn loving practices and how those translate to IBS healing.
Find the full transcript for this episode and other resources at healingheribs.com/53
Reframing Love in the IBS context
When you think about Valentine’s Day, you think about romantic love, partnership and that often desired connection with another.
You know too that whether or not you have a romantic partner in your life right now, Valentine’s Day has also been reframed to include other types of love, friendship love and I would argue too-self love.
When you are in the thick of IBS, there are a lot of bodily forces conspiring against you loving yourself and loving your body.
As you get ready for Valentines Day, I am asking you to use this holiday to your benefit, and use this day of love to actively send love to yourself in both symbolic and real practical ways.
Maybe you are wondering what self love even has to do with getting better from IBS?
How could the even be related?
If you have been listening to my podcast and following me for a little while, you hopefully are starting to see that IBS is not a disorder that is just about food.
IBS is entwined with your mind, your brain, your heart and your spirit. Holding the belief that IBS is just something going off or going wrong in your body that needs to be fixed is most of the times missing the fuller picture that will allow you to grow beyond this disoder.
You may also know by now after following my work, that safety instead of pressure is what allows your gut to calm down over time. Rewiring that loop -replacing a feeling of calm and safety for that stress response is essential.
Your gut is listening to your brain and your brain is listening to how you talk to yourself.
The Science of Self Love for IBS
Before we get into the nitty gritty of how you can practice self love this Valentines Day, let’s get a tiny bit into the weeds of scientifically why it even matters—see how it connects.
For certain women, understanding the science of these more esoteric topics is really important in order to truly buy into practices that seem “light or ineffective or Woo”.
Maybe you want the cure!! Maybe you want the perfect supplement to heal IBS, but I’m sorry love —because most likely that road to healing only provides half the story, if even that.
The other half of the story is your love life, your love life with yourself.
The science of how IBS could be improved by more intentional self love practices has to do with:
- How IBS is strongly linked to chronic activation of the stress response (sympathetic nervous system). When you practice self love, the threat perception in your body decreases allowing your body to prioritize digestion.
- Self love improves Vagus Nerve Tone which is key for digestion. Practices associated with self-love (gentle touch, kind self-talk, slow breathing, emotional safety) increase vegal tone and improve gut motility.
- Self-criticism increases gut sensitivity — compassion reduces it. People with IBS often experience visceral hypersensitivity (the gut feels pain more intensely).Research shows that Self-criticism activates the same brain regions as physical pain
Compassion activates soothing systems that dampen pain perception
Self Love Things to TRy this Valentines Day
This Valentines Day could be an opportunity for you to start a tradition with yourself that could be life changing in regards to your IBS healing journey.
I understand that you have been taught that solving problems requires you to push, and to fix. You think that solving this IBS dilemna involves finding the perfect thing outside of yourself that will make you better.
Nevertheless, the science shows a different story. The science shows that unravelling IBS is often about rewiring that brain to gut loop of stress and anxiety.
This was also my experience——which is not to say it was the WHOLE story for me (and many women) but it was a huge part of my recovery and it was the learning that I’ve taken forward in my life, the lesson that has remained with me years after having gotten better from my IBS.
Today, honestly ask yourself what would feel good to you and for you.
What act or experience would de stress you this week?
This could be so many things and is so unique for every woman, but some places my mind goes to ( in order to give you ideas if you need them):
- Visiting the ocean
- Going to a Spa or Sauna for a few hours
- Taking a bath
- Plan a nap during the afternoon
- Going out for high tea
- Visiting your favorite Sushi restaurant
- Going to a beloved Art Museum
- Watching your favorite movie in bed with tea
Loving yourself like this comes easier to some than others. To some it can seem like self indulgence or it can seem like you are faking it or trying to pretend that it’s easy.
Doing these types of activities, infused with self love and pleasure can help heal your IBS despite the voice inside you that says it can’t be that simple.
I’d like to let you all know that I will be recording and releasing podcasts on a bi monthly basis going forward for now instead of every week. I’m working on some things –actually writing a book about how to heal IBS. If you have a topic you would like to cover for the podcast you can email me at erin@nullhealingheribs.com. I’d love to hear from you and any thoughts you have or feedback.